Friday, November 26, 2010

I Am Not The Woman I Used To Be

Thanksgiving seemed like a typical Thanksgiving.  Prep food, eat, nap, etc.  It was when I was headed to the garage to put some shoes to give away that I smelled it.  Tide Stain Lifter.  After further investigation I discovered THREE bottles (I buy on sale with coupons) either upside down and leaking even though they were supposed to be closed or on their side wide open.  That wide open bottle was conveniently located at the crevice betwixt the washer and dryer and the whole top of the dryer was covered in it.  The Tide was also seeping out from under the washer and dryer.  And then I see something dripping out of the cabinet, below where I keep the bleach.  M struck again.  Apparently during nap time/at the end, he decided to "investigate".  I am so thankful that he was not injured and the bleach and Tide did not mix.  I am also thankful that I was able to leave the house to go Black Friday shopping after spending two hours cleaning up the HUGE mess in the laundry room.  Standing in the cold for an hour at T-R-U, 30 minutes shopping then standing 2 hours in the check out line was almost enough time to cool down enough to go to sleep at 2:30 am today.  I let Mr. Incredible handle the disciplinary actions, I knew I would overreact.  The really cool part is I got to meet a mom with a son very similar to M while standing in the cold.  She wants to do the GF diet to help her son, but is struggling.  I hope I was able to be an encouragement to her.

So why the post title?  It's because even just a couple of years ago, I would have screamed at M for wasting the Tide and making a mess (then apologize after I blew up).  Now I wasn't all jolly, I was firm, and he had to stay and watch me clean it up- the first hour. (He didn't clean it up due to the nature of the mess) While cleaning, I talked to him about how the choices he makes affects others, how I loved him and even though I was angry I still loved him and wanted him to be safe, etc. 

A couple other situations also happened recently.  Mr. Incredible and myself were asked if what we had was contagious (adopting kids/having "lots" of kids).  The old me would have become defensive and tried to prove a point or something, but his wife was uncomfortable that he has said something like that so I just left it as, "We like kids!".  Then today, I didn't even flinch an inch when Mr. Incredible bought a TV today at a Black Friday sale.  He's been waiting YEARS for one (and it will be nice to actually be able to see movies now).  I know 32" is by no means a BIG screen tv, but in our house you would think it's as big as a movie theaters!  (and the price was nice :))

In more serious matters though, I am still floored by how God is granting me peace (usually) in the midst of turbulent waters.  We are adopting.  We are trying to buy a new house.  We possibly found a vehicle.  My old ways were to be anxious, calculate, analyze, etc.  I strangely find myself NOT doing those things.  Yes, I know the cost of the adoption. Yes, I know the cost of the house (and I'm a little nervous with financing options).  Yes, I know the cost of the vehicle.  BUT, I also know a BIG GOD who can do BIG THINGS and I am trusting that HE will work this out.  That is freedom.

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